Sunday, March 13, 2011

Give Her a Dream

You have stolen my heart...my bride; you have stolen my heart with one glance of your eyes, with one jewel of your necklace.  ~Song of Solomon 4:9

My nine year old daughter has been asking a lot of questions lately.  You know the ones.  In one of our recent conversations, we discussed marriage and what it means to be married.  I told her that when I was her age, I used to dream of that special day, when I would get to wear a beautiful dress and walk down the aisle to stand face to face with my 'Prince Charming!'  Many of our quiet 'girl' conversations are about boys.  Certainly, I wish that she didn't care a thing about stinky little boys, but I listen, nonetheless. 
We do have rules...no boyfriends.  She is way too young to even think about that!  I asked her if she ever dreamed about her wedding day and the special man that God is preparing to be her groom, and she answered, "No."

Since we have been preparing to have 'the talk' with her, we decided to first give her a dream...

My husband and I spent much time preparing for our daughter to be a 'bride for a day.'   While he stayed home with the two younger ones, I took her to the beauty salon to get a beautiful hairstyle befitting a bride. 
Next, we stopped at the drug store and bought some Lee Press on Nails (with glitter tips, of course!)  Then we went to the Bridal shop to try on dresses (we told the clerk we were just looking for a 'special occasion!')  She tried on several and told me that she felt like an 'angel!' 
She looked like an angel. 
 After playing dress-up, we went across the street to the jewelry store.  I had prompted the jeweler, so he brought out some beautiful rings.  We discussed what the ring means and why we wear them.  Those fake nails made it all look so real! 
After departing the jewelry store empty handed, we drove to Daniel Stowe Botanical Gardens.  It is a lovely place where lots of weddings and receptions are held.  We got to see the splendid orchid display inside the Conservatory.  My daughter felt like a princess running around that castle of glass with flowers dripping from the walls.
There was a light rain, but we still managed to cover the outdoor gardens.  I watched her as she ran and played and thought about how much she is growing up.  I asked God to help me embrace it, instead of wishing I could put a cap on childhood and keep her little forever!
As we were leaving, we had the good fortune of seeing a real bride during her photo shoot.  We stood and watched and remarked how great it was to see a bride on her special day!
We climbed in the car and Ashlyn put her little veil back on and fell asleep on the way home...such a lovely site...so innocent this little bride-to-be.
We went straight to our church and quietly entered the dark sanctuary.  Her dad was sitting there trying to keep the younger two quiet.  My daughter was very surprised to see him, because she hadn't known he was a part of this special day...
He walked her down the aisle, and she told him all about the day.  They sat down and he gave her a little blue box with a locket.  The other blue box contained a key.  He explained that the locket was to her heart and the key was for her future husband.  He will hold onto it for now, he said.  He gave her a card that started like this, "You are my dearest angel.  My firstborn child.  You have a heart of gold..."  It ended with a prayer for her and her future husband.  I hadn't expected the card and appreciated how much thought he put into it.  She might not know it now, but one day she will cherish that card and the words of sentiment from a father who adores her.
Rob took our other children home, and Ashlyn and I went to Dunkin Doughnuts.  It was late and the Bakery was closed.  I had planned to take her to look at wedding cakes and to eat a cupcake to end our special day.  She didn't know the difference and was thrilled to get a powdered-covered-strawberry- filled doughnut.
We talked about the surprised look on her face from earlier that morning.  I asked her, as I often do, "What was your favorite part of the day?"
She answered, "The Lee Press on Nails and playing dress-up!" 
Yes, of course.
She is only nine years old.
~
I hope to encourage those of you with young daughters to hold their hearts.  I did not grow up knowing that I had value to a Lord and Savior who loves me so much that he died for me.  How my choices might have looked differently as a young girl and into adulthood... This world will offer darkness.  We can become desensitized to what is visible in our culture today.  Even though I have prayed that the Lord would close my children's eyes and ears to the things they shouldn't see or hear, my children have heard many things that can be difficult to explain.  Their little brains just don't have the cognitive skills yet to understand some of the heavier things in life!  Our desire was to show our daughter how very much we value her and how special she is...and how the God of the universe is mindful of her...that He values her.  It is our hope that she will value herself.  We can only counter the darkness of the world by looking for the light and seeing the beauty that the Lord intends. 
   
You are all children of the light and children of the day.  We do not belong to the night or to the darkness. ~1 Thessalonians 5:5



21 comments:

  1. This is such a heartwarming story Christie. It is such a bittersweet time when our babies really start changing into young adults. My 'baby' of my 3 kids is becoming a teenager this year... my oldest is already 18 and my middle guy is turning 16... I am SO not ready for them to be this grown up! How did they grow so very fast? When they say like a blink of an eye- it is so true. Thanks for sharing this sweet story.

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  2. how sweet! she is going to make a beautiful bride some day!

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  3. This is so beautiful I am in tears. It is so wonderful that she got to be a princess bride for the day!

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  4. As a mother of all boys, I appreciate this story and how you and your husband are teaching her about this precious covenant of marriage. Thank you for praying for her future husband. I pray for my boys' future wives and feel it is very important. Thank you for sharing this special day.

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  5. What a beautiful story! Today I heard the experience of one mother who will marry her eldest son next Saturday to his sweetheart. She told about how special this girl is and that when she was 10 years old she began to pray for her future husband - not prayers that they would find each other, but prayers in his behalf that he would make correct choices in his life and that he would be in the right places at the right times. This mother told of how special this son was and that he did indeed make all the right choices in his youth. He is now in medical school and will marry this sweet girl next week. It is never too early to start preparing our girls to fulfill their role as daughters of God and for their future roles as wives and mothers. They should have sweet expectations and it is our responsibility to give them a dream! What a sweet experience!

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  6. I have tears..What a lovely post.
    The collage is so sweet too.
    She is a lucky girl.

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  7. Oh I not only got the chills reading this but also found my eyes welling with tears! Christie this is just so beyond beautiful and what a precious memory you guys made for your girl. She will always know her value not only to you but also to her Heavenly Father and what a treasure she is! I think that by setting the "love bar" so high, she will not turn to anything less to fill her needs. Does that make sense? She knows her worth! I can't wait to do something like this with my own daughter and we are also passionate about preparing our sons to be Godly young men who know THEIR worth as well. :-) My prayer isn't only for my children's future spouses, it is for my children to grow up and be the kind of people who will attract someone with that same love for the Lord! Thank you so much for sharing this with us today and for setting such a positive example in a world where girls are being pushed to grow up long before they are ready. You are such a blessing to me my friend!
    Vanessa

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  8. Hi Christie...

    My friend, I just had to leave you a note in regards to this sweet and precious post you shared! Thank you, first of all, for sharing it with us...this was such a special event and memory for not only your daughter, but your entire family! I just think this is the most wonderful thing that I've ever heard...your sweet little daughter is certainly blessed to have a Mama and Daddy who love the Lord and have the desire to see their children raised in His ways!!! Like you, I didn't have a Godly upbringing and my young life was such a struggle in so many ways. I was saved when I was 23 and my three daughters were very young so I was able to raise them according to the Lord's plan for their lives! I sure wished I would have thought to do something similar with my daughters...it would have been so very sweet!

    I loved that your husband wrote such a sweet card to his daughter...the little locket and key is just precious! What a sweet mama and daddy that the two of you are! Again...thank you so much for sharing this very special day with us!!!

    Warmest wishes,
    Chari @Happy To Design

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  9. This is so precious! Thank you for sharing.

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  10. This is wonderful and thank you for sharing. I now want to use this for my daughter when she is older, only 2 now. If all young girls and boys can know how valued they are by God and that earthly value isn't the most important we would have far few less teen problems.

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  11. Christie, what a special day for all of you! How thoughtful of you and your husband to make this such a special time in your young daughter's life. Thank you for sharing this with all of us! I pray for God to send someone special for my youngest child( 26yo) but I don't think its ever to early for the Lord to know you depend on HIM to pick someone special for your daughter when the time is right.
    Carol

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  12. What a beautiful post. Such wonderful memories for your daughter. And I love the father, daughter moment and what he gave her. It brought tears to my eyes.

    Amy

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  13. I'm literally crying! :o) Good tears, though. What a wonderful set of parents you are, investing thought, love and quality time into your kids in such wonderful way. God bless you. They are really lucky kids.
    And your daughter looks so beautiful! How great the comparison of such deep and profound subject, with how light and fun she took it. The innocence of child is always amazing.
    thanks for sharing!
    hugs from Guatemala.

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  14. That sweet post brought tears to my eyes and joy to my heart.
    I only have a son- but we talk to him daily about respecting the girl God has chosen for him- even though he is only 14.

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  15. Christie, you so often allow our Lord to work through you, and minister to us...tears in my eyes, my husband & I are moved to plan an occasion just like this for our older daughter!
    much loves...in Him...
    ♥sevensisters

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  16. As I said in my earlier email to you, this is my favorite post. Ashlyn is such a sweet and beautiful girl. What a celebrated day and I'm sure one she will remember forever. Blessings to you..........

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  17. I love your beautiful heart Christie. I'm at a loss for words. You have challenged me with this lovely, lovely idea. What a precious statement of your and your husband's love for the greatest gift given to us...our daughters and sons. I was raised in a Christian home and still didn't "really" understand how important it was be cherished as the bride God wanted me.

    Thank you for sharing this day with us your readers...much love to you!

    Heather

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  18. How incredibly beautiful! You are such a loving mom, Christie. And you do so many wonderful things for your children - the most important, of course, teaching them the ways of the LORD. (Deut. 6:5-9)

    Blessings,
    Liz @ the Brambleberry Cottage
    http://thebrambleberrycottage.blogspot.com/

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  19. I'm a new follower to your blog and I must say. I'm glad I looked through the archives... This story touched my heart in so many ways. I do not have children yet and I can only pray that one day my husband and I will have special moments with out little ones like you have. This is a beautiful story and I'm so glad that you have given this memory to your daughter. It is one I'm sure she will cerish for many many years to come.

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